This for me captures how it feels to try and get a sense of my own mind. Both systems 1 and 2 are trying to be at work here: system 1 desperately trying to picture the scene by immediately pressing the shutter button, but system 2 clearly discontented. This was the 3rd attempt with my phone to take candid pictures before my phone died. It was clearly an untimely end; except it was a big laugh with friends instead of a failure. The peak in itself was the end, where my friends and I proceeded to carry on with the rest of the evening. Here, I witnessed an override by system 1 in the end to control my perception of the attempt; by tracing the event to joy instead of the lack of event, it created system 2 to perhaps see that it was just a happy moment. I see my friends weekly, and even after being around them frequently, I find it hard to still pinpoint how I put things in place. Of course, it might be a case of me acting too rashly, or doubting too much on what I actually like; it is a funny case in fact.
I don’t like the idea that I get overruled by a “remembering self” but again, it is just how the mind goes. In the wrong hands, such knowledge can make other individuals justify themselves wrongly and create excuses for their decisions; no matter how rash or reckless; myself back in the day included. Disturbing, but in fact enlightening; I know now where I fall short especially in my performance as a student, as a friend and as a peer, and how I can change my mindset, especially with events and ideas that have already taken place. I can anchor on the reactions of people towards my behaviour at times, and then from there, try to adjust myself. For one, I’m known to be a “try-hard” or “people pleaser”, and so, I know I have to change that. I will my skills my own, my own interests without overreaching to others and not overexerting just for the sake of fitting in. Maybe others won’t look at me the same way, but I won’t care. As long as I keep growing and changing for the better, it will do me better than others. My systems 1 and 2 are therefore my own; how I represent is also my own, and where I keep myself anchored, is my own. And so I will adjust according to how I will benefit myself for society’s sake.
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